R & R

We heard from the father of the bride last night.  Peter spoke a few words with me before asking to be handed over to Elsa.  He said what I had heard in his voice - he was exhausted, depleted.  Could he come over and unwind and camp on the den sofa?  Of course!

Many years ago, my mother, who was ill, came to live with us.  Pete and I worried about how the children would handle it.  I can still see Ian, who was about six, looking up at us and telling us that a visit would be good for Gran because "This is a house to get better in."    So is Squirrel Haven.

 Love to you all - Gramster

First Steps

I did it!

On Friday evening, Elsa chauffeured me to Fouchette in Wayne, a lovely intimate restaurant., where Chad's parents were having the Rehearsal Dinner.

Cocktails started at 7:00 p.m., but I arrived at 8:30 p.m., which was when they were scheduled to start serving dinner.   

Elsa, who did not want to worry about eating while she waited for me, had gotten take-out back at the hotel.  And what take-out it was - prime rib with all the fixings from the Outback Steakhouse across the parking lot, all compliments of her oldest brother.  She shared it with me, since dinner was still a ways to go.

Our hotel was about fifteen minutes from the restaurant.  Since she knows Wayne quite well, Elsa skirted around on side roads so that I could exit the car right at the restaurant's door.   

As I entered, I looked straight ahead at the centerpiece of the restaurant - a split staircase with a total of 24 steps.  Looking at it, my heart sank down to my boots.  It sank even lower when the hostess said there were only two ways up - carried up in a chair or under my own steam.  That chair business seemed too risky, so I chose to hoof it up all by myself.   

Jenn, the  hostess, seemed to have experience with old folks mounting the stair because she walked behind me, rather than next to me, with her hand very lightly on my back.  It was so much like what Elsa would have done, it immediately put me at my ease. Luckily for me, the staircase had several landings where I could pause and catch my breath.

I was so glad to get to the top, I just hung onto the railing for a bit, making sure I was really on "solid' ground.  The next thing I remember was hearing a chorus of people shouting variations on "You made it!"  Someone guided me to a chair that was blessed with supportive arms.

I remember a cozy setting, with intimate tables for six and no head table, or at least none that I was aware of.  Peter sat on my right and the minister who would officiate the next day sat on my left.  It was nice sitting between  Peter and Jack Grubbs, Whitney & Chad's pastor at historic Falls Church (VA).  

People stopped by and Peter would excuse himself to make his chair available for people to sit and chat with me.  Pam, mother of the bride and former daughter-in-law, has a warm relationship with our family, something everyone involved has put a lot of caring into.  She stopped by, as did her sister Alicia, her parents, and Chad's dad, Dr. I. Doyle Siddons (a retired radiological specialist).  Best of all, of course, was my chat with the bride & groom.   

I don't remember much about the food, except that it was delicious.

Sad to say, my energy flagged before dessert - and the speeches, which was what I especially wanted to hear, and the presentation of a book of "wishes" that the guests had all contributed to.   

My wish was for the two of them to enjoy the greatest delights of married love - innocence, peace,  tranquility, inmost friendship, full confidence, and mutual desire of mind & heart to do the other every good.  Since they were being married by an Episcopal minister in Peter's Presbyterian church, it felt good to slip in a quote from the Writings.

It was a great evening.  I was sorry to miss the toasts and speeches, but by 10:30 p.m. they still had not served dessert and this Grammie was ready to call it quits.  

I turned to Peter and told him it was time for me to head out.  As I explained, one of the "privileges" of old age is being able to leave whenever you are tired without being a scandal and a hissing.   

Peter called Reynolds over and asked him to walk me down.  Did me good to hear my grandson say, "Dad, let's both do it."  They did!  I descended the stair on the arms of two incredibly good-looking men.

Elsa was waiting for me, looking happy.  The plan had been for her and John to spend most of the evening at Readers' Forum, but he was back home working on a tight-deadline commission and it turned out the bookstore closed at 8:00 p.m.  Undaunted, she had checked around the corner to make sure the Gryphon Cafe was open, then headed back to tell the barkeep where she was so that she could be notified when I was ready to adios.  

She never got any farther than the bar at Fouchette!  A wonderful couple took her under their wing and insisted that she stick with them.  What could have been a solitary evening turned into a rollicking good time.  

It made a difference to me, spotting her as I made that descent.  She grinned at me and I beamed at her.  Peter and Reynolds handed me back into her keeping and we were soon headed to home (well, to Sheraton) and bed.

It was a great start to a remarkably happy weekend.

Love to all of my dear circle - the Grandmother of Mrs. Chad Key Siddons

"Closed for Happiness"

(This is one of the most tender of all Mom's Mindwalker1910 e-mails.  Between feeling super connected to my brother, Ian, as I am every Easter Week, and the birth of Riley Katherine Forbes Evans far too far away, it especially moves me in this here & now moment. - elm)

For many, many years, a favorite place to go for a restorative evening or special occasion was Bruegger's Pipersville Inn.  Peter introduced us to it, as it was a favorite haunt of his good friend Ned Pitcairn, who lived not far from it in Carversville. 

Pete and I - with possibly some family or a few friends - always started out in the cozy bar, which looked like something out of a book on the Cotswolds or some wonderful back country spot.  The bartender was as a real character and made great Old Fashions.  Then we would move onto one of the equally cozy dining rooms for an always superb dinner.

One Sunday, we were happily rambling, just the two of us, along some Bucks County back roads.  As planned, we pulled up to the Pipersville Inn for a drink.  We were surprised to find an empty parking lot - not a car in sight, not even where the staff usually parked.  

As we pulled in, Pete (who had incredible peripheral vision) had noticed a sign on the door, but it hadn't registered.  Curious, we walked up to see what was happening.  There, on the front door, was a large sign - 

"Closed for Happiness." 

What a wonderful thing to read, even if we were hadn't the vaguest idea what it meant. Pete being Pete called up the inn on Tuesday (it was closed on Mondays) to find out more.  It turns out that one of the Bruegger's children was getting married.   

The memory of that wonderful sign stayed with us.  When Pete closed down Lockhart Lumber for Peter and then for Michael's weddings, up went our own sign, "Closed for Happiness."  Today, Elsa continued the tradition, posting "This work station is closed for happiness!"  before she left Prudential.

To all my dear circle of friends, have a wonderful weekend.  I will be back on Monday.  Until then, my e-mail endeavors are very much...  

"Closed for Happiness."

And now, to bed!  Love - the Grandmother of the Bride

Wedding Prep 04/12/00

(I have NO memory of why Mom titled this "Wedding Prep" - more like "Sweethearts")

Pete, like most Lockhart men I know, was quick off the mark when he fell in love with me.  He flabbergasted me on our 6th date by asking me to marry him.  I was completely taken by surprise, but managed to say, "Yes!"

Of course we were both itching to be together, but the plan was to get

married in 18 months.  It seemed a very long wait.  Of course, jumping

the gun and having sex before the wedding night was unheard of back then.

Which is not to say we weren't tempted.  Pete and I always considered ourselves very lucky that when the one wanted to cave in, the other was blessed with clearer sight and less heated emotions. 

Still, one evening, Pete turned to me and asked, "Could we get married NOW?" Again, I was surprised but said, "Let's get out pen and paper." 

We figured out that we could afford to get married IF we did not need a dentist or doctor or new clothes.  That did it - we moved up the wedding date.

Pete actually asked, "Can we get married tomorrow?"  I gently explained to a very disappointed young man the realities of putting on a wedding.  He was none too happy, but we finally set the date for July 18, several months away.

Of all our friends and relatives, Ellen Lear and my sister Betty were the only two who did not think we'd lost our minds. 

It is funny, looking back on it, how I had no hesitation about making Betty's wedding dress when she married Paul several years later, but the thought of making my own left me shaking in my boots.

 I found my wedding dress - a lovely gown of silk organdy - at Dewees on Chestnut Street.  It was on sale for $15.  Before thinking "What a buy!"  know that Pete's weekly salary was $17.00  Money was worth a lot more back then.  I found an elegant pair of long white kid gloves - the fabric of the left hand ring finger had to be slit so Pete could slip on the ring. 

Our rings came from Fred Cooper's - two 18 carat gold bands.  We had planned on getting 24 carat, but Mr. Cooper advised us against it because the gold would wear so fast;  as it was, the decorated edging was completely worn away by the time Elsa was born. 

At Woolworth's, I purchased two lengths of white silk flowers which I entwined into a wreath** for my bridal veil.  The veil itself was Wanamaker's best tulle. 

Pete's father and step-mother honored us with a dinner party.  What an evening to remember that was.  It was blistering hot, but "Aunt" Norma was a wonderful hostess and knew how to throw such a party, we hardly gave a thought to the steaming weather.  She served garden cocktails before dinner, champagne with, and port was served with dessert.  

 I cannot remember a thing about most of the dinner except that it was heavenly, but I do remember dessert.  "Aunt" Norma served a double peach pie.  I never saw one before and have never seen one since.  It was a single crust peach pie with a second smaller peach pie somehow miraculously centered inside.  Oh, it tasted so good,  super light crusts paired with perfectly ripe peaches. 

Pete was bowled over by the dress I wore that night - a black organdy gown with white plastrons (if you know what they are - white facings, if that helps at all) that I made with my own two little hands.  When I put on the black taffeta underslip on that over-heated day, it felt like hot metal.  But even I had to admit I looked quite stunning. 

The weather that night was so hot that when Pete's Uncle Andrew stood up, we heard his white linen trousers sticking to the leather seat.  I will never forget that sound or the sight of the chair cushion, covered with a fuzz of white lint, and his somewhat lighter trousers

Isn't it funny, the things that stay with us after all these years.  I hope those loving family spirits are with us this weekend.

Love to my circle - the Grandmother of the Bride

Four days and counting 04/11/00

Four days until my granddaughter's wedding.  I had a delightful taste today of the happiness to come.  I was on the receiving end of four calls:

• from Mim, returning my call checking if she will be camping out at the Sheraton where the wedding guests are headquartered (she will)
• from my niece Linda Ripley Murray, checking in from California to see how things were
• from my niece Peggy Reynolds Peddicord, checking in from Missouri about when they expect to arrive on Friday
• and from none other than the father of the bride himself, Peter.

I am one happy lady tonight!

Love to one & all - the Grandmother of the Bride